Posted by: wrmcnutt | September 8, 2009

Time’s UP!


Wow.  This does seem sudden.  We went to the pulmonologist this morning and had the same meeting we’ve had four times.  The details were the same.  If we proceed with the surgery, there is a better than fifty percent chance that Dad will die.  But if we don’t proceed with the surgery, there is a one hundred percent chance that Dad will die before three years are out, and that the last half of it will suck.  The other alternative, chemo-radio therapy will generate suck immediately, wont’ cure the cancer, and will suck indefinitely.

Well – today we went to see the pulmonologist and had the same discussion we’ve had three times already.  The man did everything but stand on his desk and sing choruses from Another One Bites the Dust and Tears in Heaven to make it clear just how dangerous this is going to be.   Then we shook hands and went and consulted with the surgeon.  This conversation was shorter, and more of a confirmation.  Then we set the date.  Monday morning.  The inprocessing will be at 8:00 in the morning.  Dad will go under at 10:00 am.  And then we’ll deal with what comes after.

It’s very odd, really.  I was losing patience with consulting with doctors and running more tests, but now that we’ve set at date, it’s not even a week away.  All of a sudden, time has run out.  Less than a week just seems, not enough time.  There’s still time to say stuff we need to, and to do some paperwork.  But lots of other things that we haven’t gotten around to are wildly unlikely to happen now.

I’ve spoken to my sister, and his.  Neither was surprised.  Neither was happy.  But both were supportive, and plan to be at the Hospital with me Monday morning when the surgery begins.

Dad’s only got his sister, and one cousin left from his generation.  There were disturbingly few people to notify.

We went to Calhoun’s on the Waterfront for lunch, after we set the date.  He had what I believe was his first beer in about five years.  He’s been off alcohol since the stroke.  He’s held himself to two J&B and water’s a year.  One on New Year’s Eve, and one on the 4th of July.  But he said he felt the odd need to celebrate.  With the date set, I guess he has some feeling of closure.

I guess I do, too.  I mean, at least we’re done thinking, guessing, and testing.  Now he’s going to take his chances, and I will help him deal with whatever comes after.

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Responses

  1. You know you can count on prayers….straight through Monday.

  2. Bill,
    I, too, have you and your Dad in my prayers.

  3. It sounds like he has made the decision that was right for him, and that you are doing the right thing in supporting him, come what may. We’ll all be keeping your well being in our hearts, and lots of good thoughts are going to be heading your way. Thank you for keeping us informed.

  4. Bill,
    Your Dad, you and the family are in my thoughts and prayers.

  5. I know I’ve been totally out of touch (directly at least) but I want you to know I’ve been keeping track and you and your dad are in my thoughts daily. I wish there was something I could do or say, but so do you and everyone else I suppose. I have great respect and admiration for your dad and count him among my friends for certain.

  6. *hugs* If I was there instead of here, I’d wait with you. I know what that’s like — and it sucks.

  7. You familiy is in our prayers, and will be for the duration, hugs to you!

  8. As you know, I’ve been there, done that, Bill, and it sure isn’t easy. My heart and prayers are with you and your family.

  9. Bill,
    I can’t possibly understand how you are feeling (yet) so I won’t give you platitudes, just know that we are so very sorry that this is happening and we care about you.
    You and your family are in our prayers constantly.

    Deirdre, Martin and Ginny

  10. We all die eventually, but very few have any say in the how or when. I know that your Dad is head strong and stubborn. He wants to have his say in this matter even to his own detriment. If this is his end, he’ll have it his way.
    I also know his son is stubborn and strong willed. You are having more ‘life events’ that any one person should in a short time. My thoughts are with you and your sister as you are the ones who must carry on regardless of what happens on Monday. Your father is in the best of hands at the moment and his fate is his own. Don’t forget to take as good care of yourself as you are of him.
    Peace to you all.

  11. I’m thinking of you and your sister Bill. I hope all goes smoothly.
    -Randalin

    • It was great to hear from you. Thanks,
      Bill


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